Contentment

Bible school has forced me to really think about where I'm at in my spiritual life. There's so much on my mind that I don't even know where to start in dealing with it. However, what comes to mind first is the idea of contentment(This really doesn't have much to do with what I've been learning here... but it relates a little). Anyway, before this summer, I felt like I was always looking forward... almost waiting for something exciting to happen. I was looking forward to such things as: finishing highschool, going to camp, meeting "Prince Charming", etc... However, this past summer I finally realized that I was no longer doing that. It was incredible to realize that I was finally LIVING in the moment! I was completely content with what was happening in my life. I wasn't counting down the days to finish my job, even when it was stressful. There I was... I felt like I had finally reached something long sought-after. It was amazing! Yet I was scared.... What if I lost that feeling? I had no desire to go back to being discontent and living for the next good time. I didn't even want to go to sleep, when I first realized it!

Well, it really didn't take long for me to get over the anxiety. I realized that now that I had more control over it now. I still got down, but I learned to realize that I could be unhappy about something, yet still have joy deep down because I had God in my life and God is amazing!

Ok, now I'm going beyond that. So, I've had a couple months to live in the contentment. I love my life right now. I love Briercrest! I love my new friends! And I'm having an awesome time! You could say that I'm content with life. Things couldn't get much better right now, right? That's what I thought anyway.... however, now I'm not so sure. Yes, God wants me to be content with life. But that does not mean I can sit there and just enjoy life! God pushes us to do more than that. I can't just think that I've finally "arrived" so I can relax. I still have so much to learn..... My goal now is to push beyond the contentment and genuinely seek God's will more than ever before. God's plans for me are bigger than my own will ever be! So, how about I let him be in charge? :)